I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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