The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
