So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize