I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
