The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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