She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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