i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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