Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
The uberlube is also flammable
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
