Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize