I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
