When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
