ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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