I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.