it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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