his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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