butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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