They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
