meet me or not, i'm out of control
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
