Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
