i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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