: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
