and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I would fuck him just for his dog
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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