Hey man sorry I got all grabby
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
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Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
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party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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