At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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