after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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