I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
This can only be settled by a dance off.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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