Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
