Screwed.edu
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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