So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
