Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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