Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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