Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
