did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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