god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
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I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
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My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.