I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
