I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
