brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.