There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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