the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
