I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I need help removing her.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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