Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
