I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
