My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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