I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
