If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
