I'm jealous of your bromance
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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