better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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