I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
