Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
