I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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