Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
